How to Fake Sick to Skip School


Ugh school’s coming back. If only there was
some way to get out of it. I mean it’s not like you can just drop out, right?
Wait- can I do that? DAD? So I just found out, it’s probably not the best idea. Something
about being a failure, already being enough of a disappointment as
it- you know what, honestly I wasn’t really listening that much,
uh so whatever, but the good news is, there’s another way. One that doesn’t involve minimum
wage jobs for the rest of my life. Alright hear me out for a second. Faking sick.
What? Who is this guy? Yeah. I’m a genius. Faking sick to me is an art,
and I’ve put in so much time and effort that it’s an art that I’ve mastered. And today,
I’m passing on all of my wisdom to you guys. Also my mom’s probably gonna watch this video
and recognize these moves so um… I got you! The goal in faking sick is to trick your parents
into beliving you. If your are vouching for you, even your teacher can’t make you come
in. But parents are smart! I mean, when they were
your age, they were probably doing the exact same thing.
You gotta make your sickness seem legit, and to do so, it’s gonna take some work. The first
thing you wanna do, even before faking sick, is to make school seem like it’s your priority.
“Aw man, we have this super cool assignment tomorrow and I’m so excited to hand it in.”
“Tomorrow’s pizza day, alright? I’m not missing that.” Setting this up is super critical because
when you suddenly get sick, you’re gonna be more disappointed that you
can’t go to school than your parents are, and that makes you being sick, all the more
believable. “Aw man I really want to hand this 10-page
essay that’s- it’s so finished, but I *coughs* I can’t, so.. I’m sorry.” Next thing you’re gonna wanna do is to pick
a sickness and to stick to it. If you’re trying to convince your parents that you’re sick,
you’re gonna need some proof and that involves research. What temperature do you need to
be to have a fever? What are all the symptoms of having a cold?
What does puking sound like? It’s the homework that you wished you’d been assigned. No?
Just me? Oh. Puking is definitely the easiest to fake cause it just involves going to the
washroom and doing this sound for a while. *puking sounds* *coughing sounds*
The cough’s I’m just throwing in for good measure. Because I’m an actor, dammit. But
hey, you can’t puke everytime so try giving yourself a fever.
All you gotta do is soak a towel in some hot water and leave it on your forehead so when
your parents feel your forehead they’ll be like,
“aw, you’re burning up, you can’t go to school!” What’s risky here is you only have so much
time between drying your forehead and getting your parents to feel your forehead,
so you gotta act fast. Okay so I got my towel here, and I’m just
gonna apply it. Let it sit there for a while, so you get all warmed up.
*coughs* Hey Juan can you *coughs* can you come take my temperature I think I’m *cough*
sick. Okay Andrew?
Yeah. I’m not your father. You’re an adult.
Yeah. And you don’t even have anything
to be sick for because you’re a sad, pathetic, unemployed, loser.
Oh yeah. And that’s how you fake sick! Remember to
not overuse this. If you do it too much it’s gonna become way too obvious that you’re faking,
and then it’ll just never work again. So don’t be sick every other day. Wait until there’s
an assignment due tomorrow that you haven’t even started.
Or until something super embarassing just happened at school and you, you can’t show
your face there. Or you know, Friday. Anyways that’s all for the video, I hope you
enjoyed it. If you did, be sure to give it a thumbs up. On my last video I asked for
1,500 likes, and it got over 2,000 in 3 days, which is
just crazy. Thank you for that. So I’m just gonna shoot for the stars today and say,
let’s get 2,500 thumbs up on today’s video. Make sure you subscribe to me, I make new
videos every Friday, and like today, I’m gonna try to throw in an extra one every
here and there, and with all that being said, I’ll see you guys next week?!

100 thoughts on “How to Fake Sick to Skip School

  1. Me: Coughing a lot throwing up and faking to be sick
    Mom: you should stay home from school today
    Me: But its pizza day
    Mom: Okay then you should go to school it sounds fun
    Me: damn

  2. So I left my math book at school and I needed to give her homework but I forgot it at school and now I’m scared if she will get mad so idk if I should stay home because then my math homework still won’t be done soooo likeeeee

  3. Just pretend your sick the day before that what I’m doing right now just hoping my mom will let me stay home

  4. The hot forehead one you could just take a really hot bath for a long time and make sure it's really hot and your whole body will stay hot

  5. I faked stomach aches and like.. my mum didn’t even look at me suffering. “Put on your uniform.” Then she walked away. :’)

  6. Tips:
    Say you don’t feel to good the day before if possible

    Use a hot water bottle or a cup with hot water in it not a towel it saves time as you don’t have to dry your head so your parents can feel your head as quick as possible

    Make yourself vomit if you can (I shove a tooth brush down my throat a few times until it works). If you can’t vomit make fake sick

    Stay in bed and act very dull

    Fake cry ask for water and shake as you drink it

    Take medicine even though you don’t need it

    Remember don’t do it to often I only do this like three times a year ( also I have a science test tomorrow plus a big assignment so I’m praying my mum lets me stay off) wish me luck 🙏🤕

  7. Another tip oversleep on purpose after saying how sick you felt last night. Your parents will feel bad for waking you and when the do say how sick you feel

  8. It always happens to me that I fake sick and my parents give me the day off but then realise that I'm not but then a different day I actually am sick and they don't believe me

  9. [Thought I'd post my own little tips here too XD] Pro tip: Do this at night, this minimizes your chances of being caught.

    1. Take a REALLY cold shower/bath. Do this for as long as you can, this puts stress on the immune system and basically makes harder for it to fight bacteria. After the shower/bath DO NOT DRY OFF! This will keep the body cold and immune system will stay stressed. I recommend putting on wet clothing as well (not warm clothing, but shorts and sleeveless thin shirts), it makes sure you stay cold.

    2. Lick doorknobs around your house. Make sure you do this right after step 1. People touch doorknobs all the time and the chances that someone has bacteria on their hands or that someone didn't wash are high.

    3. Weaken your immune system. Stay up as late as you can or wait until the last minute to go the sleep. Ex: Say you normally get up at 6:00am to get ready for school, go to sleep at 5:00am or 4:00am. One, this just put more stress on the immune system. And second, you will naturally seem more tired and slow. If you want to stay up all night then try looking up how to pull an all nighter there are plenty of videos on it. Some other way to weaken the immune system are: Poor hygiene, and dehydration. Just in case you wanna hit those extra marks. DO NOT SLEEP UNDER WARM COVERS. Either sleep with thin covers or none at all, you cannot risk getting warm.

    REMEMBER TO STAY COLD THROUGHOUT THIS, WARMING UP IS A SURE FIRE WAY FOR THIS PLAN TO NOT WORK!

    Extra. Make your voice sound scratchy I don't know much about this but look up the channel Queries of the Interweb. He has a video on how to losing your voice as well as a whole playlist on getting 'sick'

    Now have fun getting sick 😉

  10. I go “mum I really don’t feel well I’ve got a headache and I feel sick and on top of that I have bellyache,but I don’t want to miss a(then I say a random lesson) then she goes oh well it depends what you want to do 🤨

  11. Schools probaly not gonna make me be anything but im doing it cuz if u somehow manage to get through it thats an achievement

  12. The hot cloth could be replaced with a non-refillable water bottle filled partly with water. Just make sure there's no air and the shape is relaxed so it can form to your forehead. That way, you can just hide the water bottle and have a ahem "fever."

  13. I gotta be sick to stay home which means i have no bedtime, so i can be early to watch bts new comeback album:D

  14. I need to take being sick tommorow because I have a lot of drama and stuff going on….
    So yeah :T
    I think I'll need a day off

  15. It's easier in school for me! I said that my stomach hurts and school called my parents to come to pick me up

    Then I got beaten up by parents cuz they didn't belive me

  16. 40 years olds know the warning!
    Be Careful because if you overplay you're hand a mom could take off from work & keep you in bed all day or like
    Ferris said~ you could end up in a DR.s office & that's worse then school

  17. Now that im the parent i let my daughter stay home if she wants to.
    reason why is because she has never asked to.. But she also hasn't hit middle school yet.. oh shit!
    (double post fckTard! my bad everyone.)

  18. Here’s to all the people saying school isn’t helpful. Well, you’re right! If you’re going to be a youtuber when you grow up, or if you’ve already started, why do you need to know half the stuff you’re teaches?

    Ps: To stay home from school, i stay up really late, and make myself feel terrible, get a towel and put hot water on it, rub it on my head, make myself cry, and say “But I wanna go to school, but I can barely move 🙁 Sorry mum for being sick!” Then she’ll feel dead sorry for me and keep me off for the week, 🙂

  19. Guys to make fake puke mix in a plastic bag a brown sugar pop tart and how many depends on how much you want and 1/2 cup of water until it mixes a very light brown and also dark brown and there you go! Also make sure there are no chunks. Make sure you also make it smell very bad

  20. What i actually did is i went to the bathroom put some watter in my mouth and do the loudest puking sound i can while the watter from my moth fell into the toilet and did a sound that made my parents believe i puked

  21. So one day on a monday i almost threw up, i was really pale, clammy, hot but shivering exc….
    So i stayed off school

    The next day was a trip to an amusement park and i still felt ill (i didnt tell my mum) but i went to school anyway lol
    Just as i arrived i felt like i was gonna puke so i had to go home AGAIN. long story short, my mum didnt believe that i was sick cuz "i was fìne when i left" so now i cant stay off school cuz she wont believe me…
    All that for a school trip i didnt even go on…

  22. I fake sick only when I need to. I faked being sick yesterday and got the day off. Most of the time it works. But I only fake sick in times of need. For example *homework days*.

  23. Thanks but what if some parents don't care even if your sick still go to school its like wtf get the hole school sick yay no more school lol

  24. Your puking doesn't sound real enough, first go to the toilet and sin really fast, it will make y I u feel nausea and headache, and then try to puke. It will sound very realll

  25. How to be sick: Lick your walls and anything ro get sick fast and then say ''I don't feel so good Mr. Stark''

  26. Fake sick wont work

    Our parents is smart as hell
    they will bring us to the doctors

    i need the tutorial how to get a real sick
    i don't care if it's painful at least i wont go to school

  27. My baby sister watching this: hey mom i think im pooping unicorns

    me: what

    mom: u watch too much my little pony

  28. Blow-dryer on your face, something hot under your tongue, icepacks on your hands to make them cold, and if you really want to go all the way, Banana and Sprite so you actually puke.

    Years of practice and watching cartoons.

  29. The only thing that works for me is playing sick after i come home from school i play sick and go in bed early to be fresh at night then ill sleep and ill be tired and get some extra beliving from my parents that im sick cuz i played it the day before

  30. Easier way: if or when you have cereal in the morning chew it and run to the toilet then make a noise as if you were throwing up then spit it out and say you were sick? Might work lol

  31. anyone dipped at lunch rn and finding a way to fake sickess for a excuse b4 ur parents come home…on a friday……..only me……ok

  32. i faked a cold so well that i even convinced myself i had a cold and now i actually do have a cold and that’s karma kids

  33. Lol I used to hate going to school and my mom would get pissed at me because she knew I was fake sick mainly because I would stay up all night and sleep got to me. I regret not going to school and ditching periods lol senior year was so easy man I would ditch damn near every day. I miss highschool and seeing all my friends that I don’t see anymore. That adult life is tough. Go to school and cherish the moments with your friends

  34. how i do it: promise to do your work while in bed but actually just watch youtube and every hour or few hours eat some soup chew it up then spit it in the toilet 🙂

  35. Just make yourself throw up with salt water!
    1. Get hot enough water that you can still drink it buts its hot (Make sure you can drink it in one go!)
    2. Put 2 or 3 spoons of salt in.
    3. Mix it and then drink.
    After 20 – 40 minutes you should throw up! I mean its a free 2 day skive for school!
    If you want to stay off for a week repeat this more than 2 times! Make sure your parents don't know!

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